21 Sep How To Find Peace In Chaos
On a day that started so perfectly, an imperfect thunderstorm of events shook me to my core. My stress levels were off the roof, I felt a burst of anger circle my mind like a shark looking to pounce on its prey, and I was left feeling so vulnerable in the aftermath of it all.
Let me back up.
I woke up feeling energetic on a bright Wednesday morning, excited to start my day. I barely remembered how I felt yesterday, and I pushed that feeling aside as I sat down to have my breakfast. I kiss my family goodbye and head to the lift, and reach my basement to hop into the car and drive to work.
I see that there is an overflow of water, the drainage has been clogged right next to my car and there’s a whole mush of stink and sh*t.
How I felt yesterday came SCREAMING back at me. I remember seeing the same dirty muck when I parked the car. I remember being so put off by it, that I crept over to the passenger seat to exit through a cleaner area, I also remember a nagging sensation I felt about leaving my headlamp on.
Today, I was not only standing in literal sh*t, I was feeling like it when I realized that my car’s battery was completely out.
From Panic To Pathetic:
I quickly decided that I needed to call an on-road service agent to kick start my car. So I managed to lock the car with my keys ( I haven’t done that since 1999) and went home to Google the contact details of the service agency nearby. I reach home, and the perfectly working WiFi that I used just seconds before I left, is now, GONE.
It turns out that the whole area where I live, has a telephone issue, so the WiFi was out.
So yeah, naturally, negative thoughts and emotions engulfed me. I started to panic, I got mad at the WiFi company, I even snapped at a friend that tried to help me and I started to look at the past and blame myself for all the stupidity I caused.
“If I had just looked back at the car, overlooked the discomfort of the drainage being unclogged right next to my car, I would have caught that the head lights were on. “- This thought was playing in my mind, nonstop.
But blaming yourself, for something in the past, is the last thing one should do.
So to distract myself, I forced myself to worry more about getting to work. I started asking a friend to help me out with the right number for the on-road service. I went from one number to another, and an hour later, I was able to call the right person.
After an hour, he came to repair the battery and he told me to keep the car running for at least an hour.
Long story short, I turned off the car, FORGETTING that he told me to keep it running and all hell broke loose!
I had to go through the whole process again, and my state of mind was chaotic and far away from being mindful.
To Patience and Peace:
Sometimes in life, it’s better to go with the flow. Even if you feel like you are drowning, you will eventually be able to pull yourself up, shake off the past and move on.
When I gave into my situation and didn’t try to fight it, I was at ease and all the meditation I practiced caught up with me. I was able to simply let go and find some clarity.
I’m not saying it’s easy, neither is it impossible. Whenever you find that you were able to remind your mind to stay with the present, whether it’s a bad day or a good day, do it! Encourage that feeling.
” Meditation is the discovery that the point of life is always arrived at in the immediate moment. – Alan Watts”
Nehita is a mindfulness expert who writes extensively on lifestyle management, wellness and ways to lead a healthier and a happier life. She is a part of Aware’s expert team on meditation. She is also an avid artist who spends most her time dribbling amazing stories through art.