28 Jul Meditation Showed Me How To Love

‘Learning to love yourself brings more happiness and peace than trying to love somebody else.’

This was what my mother often told me. As a growing young, out of control and rebellious teenager who was low on self-esteem, obviously I never believed her; rather I didn’t pay any heed to it.
Years later when my mother is just a memory, I realize how true those noble words were. Deep down inside I yearn to hug her once and thank her for edifying me with the stepping stone of meditation on a pathway of uncovering myself.
Meditation for me meant a space where I could imbibe how incredibly outstanding I am by teaching me to love myself. Let me clarify that I never loathed myself ever.

In my teenage days, I was an average looking girl with average grades in school. Both my parents were working and being their only child I often stayed alone at home after my classes. I was not stunningly beautiful or a bombshell neither was I a topper in class. However, my story is not about beauty or ugliness. My story is not about my grades in school or college. Rather it is about the scarcity of determination and courage.
My tenth standard board examinations were approaching. My nervousness was at its peak. I spent most of my day studying or worrying about my studies. I tossed and turned on my bed to put myself to sleep. My mother noticed my cold sweats and uneasiness. To loosen me up, she persuaded me to practice mindful meditation for about thirty minutes at the crack of the dawn.
Reluctantly but regularly I did practice meditation at the wee hours. This spiritual journey helped in the betterment of my mind and body. I started taking this up more religiously now. It enhanced my mood and my attitude towards my career and studies. It made me at ease with myself. I started enjoying my daily routine which I otherwise found to be monotonous. Meditation actually transformed my negative fixation into a positive one. It further injected me with inner peace and confidence which I had been desirous of.

The confidence I gained led me to the path of success. Believing in yourself is what permits you to puff up and reach your capability. It is today, years later that I realize that my low self-esteem had held me back to timidity and inaction. I, time after time missed out on the opportunities because of the same.
Once I was done with my education, I wanted to initiate a business of my own. I was not afraid of striking out on a cutting edge idea even when those around me were still pondering over it. I was able to stand up for myself in a consistent manner. I did not take any needless or irrelevant work or obligations. I was firm in saying a no when I needed to. After the initial success, I started testing my limits and stretching them further. Not that I did not face a minor setback or a failure but I had the courage to gracefully accept my flaws also.
For a person like me who was rebellious, it was a startling surprise for everyone around to see how I accepted my shortcomings. This was only possible because of the changes meditation had injected in me over the years. I was content with my life that I had fallen in love. I was not in love with anything or any person around me. I was in love with myself. I realized my worth and never underestimated myself after that.
In addition to that I realized that to love others, it is very important to love yourself first.

About the Author: Aanchal Mehra
A young working professional from India who has always achieved more than she could ever dream. A member of our Science Team showing the impact meditation has made on her to the world.